Dec 13, 2023
The Art of Surrender: A Beginner's Guide to Submissive Sex in BDSM
by DLS Team
Have you ever felt intrigued by the idea of relinquishing control to someone else? Perhaps the thought of being restrained or disciplined excites you, and you’ve considered delving into the world of submissive sex. If you find yourself nodding in agreement, rest assured that you’re not alone. Submissive sex is actually one of the most common fantasies.
If you’re a beginner in BDSM and feeling overwhelmed by the vast amount of information out there, don’t panic. Navigating this new territory can be confusing, but fear not – we’re here to guide you. In this article, we’ll provide you with the necessary information to start your submissive journey, allowing you to experience the best of submissive sex in the bedroom.
1. Conduct Thorough Research
As you embark on this new and kinky journey, it’s crucial to educate yourself about BDSM and its various activities. Treat it like you would a college thesis. Read books on the subject, participate in BDSM forums, and seek advice from experienced BDSM couples. Don’t rush into a decision to become submissive based on a passing whim; instead, make an informed and rational choice.
2. Take Time for Self-Reflection
Once you’ve educated yourself, take a moment to deeply reflect on your desires. Ask yourself why you feel drawn to submission and what aspects of it truly resonate with you. Consider your comfort level and establish your personal boundaries. Determine what you’re willing to explore and what is off-limits. It’s important to engage in submissive activities that genuinely bring you pleasure.
3. Choose the Right Partner
Selecting a trustworthy Dom is of utmost importance. Unfortunately, there are individuals who may pose as Dominants but are simply looking to exploit others. Be cautious and find someone you can truly trust. Look for a partner who understands the dynamics of BDSM, can guide you safely, and always prioritizes your well-being. Remember, pain and pleasure should coexist in a healthy BDSM relationship.
4. Show Respect with Honorifics
Addressing your Dom as “Sir” or “Master” not only establishes the power dynamics in your relationship but also enhances the mood during BDSM play scenes. Using the honorifics your Dom has chosen demonstrates respect and reinforces the roles you’ve adopted.
5. Set the Scene with Proper Attire
To fully immerse yourself in the submissive mindset, dress in appropriate attire for your BDSM play sessions. Transform each other’s fantasies into reality. Communicate with your Dom about the desired outfits, whether it’s a specific costume or provocative clothing. The visual aspect plays a significant role in BDSM activities, allowing you to embrace your character and mentally prepare for your submissive role.
6. Nonverbal Admiration
When you and your Dom are in a safe and trusting space, express your adoration without words. Let your eyes convey your devotion and admiration for your Dom. Silent communication can be just as powerful as verbal expression. Your Dom will take pleasure in knowing you admire and worship them, creating a deeper connection.
7. Vocalize Pleasure and Pain
During BDSM play, vocalize your pleasure and pain through moans, yelps, or other sounds. This communicates your experience to your Dom and enhances the intensity of the scene. However, always respect your Dom’s rules; if they’ve forbidden you from making noise, comply accordingly.
8. Utilize BDSM Props
Experiment with BDSM toys such as blindfolds, mouth gags, ropes, and handcuffs. Allow your Dom to incorporate these props into your play. Being bound to the bedpost or silenced by a mouth gag can add excitement and intensity to the experience. Embrace the use of impact toys like paddles or whips for disciplinary play, and relish the struggle against restraints.
9. Distinguish Fantasy from Reality
While recreating your fantasies in real life can be exhilarating, it’s important to maintain a clear distinction between fantasy and reality. Always remember that BDSM play is consensual role-play and not a reflection of your actual relationship. Maintain open communication, respect boundaries, and prioritize safety.
10. Embrace Patience as a Beginner
As a beginner, it’s crucial to be patient with yourself and your Dom. Learning and growth take time. Expect trial and error as you navigate your way through this new experience. With a willingness to learn and communicate, the journey to becoming the perfect submissive for your partner will be rewarding.
Conclusion
If you’ve made the decision to explore submissive sex, remember to have fun along the way. Embrace the guidance of your Dom, assuming you’ve chosen the right partner. Being a submissive means surrendering control and following your Dom’s lead. Trust in the process and allow yourself to fully immerse in this exciting realm of BDSM.