Sep 24, 2023
HOW TO STOP FEELING GUILTY ABOUT MASTURBATION SHAME?
by DLS Team
Dan Kennedy
In a world where discussions about female pleasure have often been relegated to the shadows, it’s crucial to shed light on the importance of self-love and self-discovery. Female masturbation, in particular, has been surrounded by misconceptions, leaving many women unsure about the normalcy of their desires and actions. The unfortunate result? Overwhelming feelings of shame and guilt. But fear not, for we’re here to guide you on a journey towards embracing your own body, understanding the roots of shame, and ultimately, celebrating self-pleasure as an act of self-care and empowerment.
1. LOVE YOUR BODY
Loving your body is a fundamental step towards overcoming shame associated with female masturbation. It may sound simple, but it’s often a lifelong challenge for many women. Begin by acknowledging and appreciating 5-10 things about your body that make you feel empowered, strong, unique, or simply good. These qualities are what truly matter. By focusing on these positive aspects, you’ll build the confidence needed to embrace your own desires.
2. UNDERSTAND WHY YOU FEEL SHAME
To conquer feelings of shame, it’s essential to explore why they exist in the first place. Reflect on the cultural influences, religious beliefs, and historical contexts that have shaped your perceptions. Historically, female masturbation was stigmatized and even prescribed as a medical treatment for “Hysteria.” Recognize that these notions are outdated and misleading. Questioning the shame you feel is the first step towards liberation. Take your time to ponder or journal your thoughts; knowledge empowers you.
3. CHANGE YOUR MINDSET
The first step towards a healthier relationship with masturbation is a change in mindset. Understand that there is no reason to feel shame about this natural act. Instead, consider it an act of self-care and self-love. Seek out daily pleasures and incorporate self-exploration into your self-care routine. Take note of how it makes you feel—lighter, more energized, and happier. Focus on these positive emotions to help you feel empowered by self-love rather than weighed down by negative thoughts.
If you really struggle to overcome these negative feelings, try to compare it to other actions you do that give you pleasure and show you how much you love. Go for a massage, spend a day at the spa or prepare the food you love. Showing love for oneself is healthy and necessary, do not separate the sexuality of that self-care and respect.
4. EXPLORE YOUR BODY
Masturbation isn’t just about the vulva; it encompasses your entire body. If you’re easing into self-pleasure or overcoming guilt, consider exploring every part of your body except your vulva for a start. Start with a sensual massage, using oils or lotions on your erogenous zones. Experiment with different pressure points to discover what stimulates your body and mind. As you progress, focus on the areas that bring you the most pleasure. Take your time and savour these often under-appreciated parts of your body that can provide a lot of immense pleasure.
5. DON’T SHY AWAY FROM PERSONAL INTIMACY
Take the opportunity to connect with your vulva on a deeper level. Consider visually exploring the area by using a mirror or gently drawing your labia. This practice helps you become better acquainted with a part of your body that you might not have thoroughly explored before, enhancing your understanding of your personal anatomy. Alternatively, use your fingers to explore your inner and outer labia before gradually moving on to explore your vagina and, eventually, your G-Spot. Approach this journey with kindness, attention, and love for yourself.
6. GET TO KNOW YOUR PREFERENCES
Understanding your body and its unique responses is key to unlocking the full potential of solo pleasure. Maybe you find comfort in the soothing streams of the shower, or perhaps certain positions and techniques send shivers down your spine. Perhaps you’ve recently uncovered the mystical realm of the G-spot, and you simply can’t get enough. Whatever your desires, take your time to explore and embrace them fully. By doing so, you not only enhance your pleasure but also shed the unnecessary burden of guilt that sometimes accompanies self-indulgence. Forget those negative thoughts and remember, there’s absolutely no shame in embracing in your own sexual glory!
7. ROMANCE WITH YOURSELF
At the heart of self-pleasure is the act of loving yourself, both figuratively and literally. So, why not set the mood and create an atmosphere that’s as sensual and romantic as any other intimate encounter? Start by lighting some scented candles, allowing their soft glow to fill the room with a warm, inviting ambiance. Spritz a bit of your favourite perfume into the air; after all, you deserve to smell and feel irresistible. Dim the lights to a soft, flattering glow that sets the stage for a truly intimate rendezvous with yourself.
Remember, self-love is about more than just the physical act itself. It’s an opportunity to explore your desires, fantasies, and what truly excites you. Take your time and savour every moment; there’s no need to rush through this personal adventure. You are your own muse, and you deserve nothing but the best. So, go ahead, indulge in the romance, and let it envelop you in a world of sensual delight.
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